Joe Rogan
Origen
Gregory of Nyssa
Thomas Aquinas
Isaac of Nineveh
“What is Hell, really?” – Episode 89
Introduction:
It finally happened. Joe Rogan invited the early Church Fathers on his podcast.
No one really knows how. There were mushrooms involved.
But what followed was the most listened-to, least understood episode in human history.
Joe Rogan: “So you’re telling me hell might not be eternal? That’s wild, man.”
Gregory of Nyssa: “It is not wild—it is divine. Mercy that ends is no mercy at all.”
Joe: “Yeah but like… if everyone’s saved eventually, what’s the point of trying now?”
Origen: “Because the journey is the healing. And love doesn’t delay itself—it moves now.”
Joe: “Wow. Did you just say love is like DMT?”
Isaac of Nineveh: “No. But I’m not saying you’re wrong.”
Jamie (offscreen): “Pull up that quote, man. ‘What is hell but the burning away of what is not love?’ That’s Gregory, right?”
“This is blowing up. We’ve never had so many monks in the comments.” —Jamie, probably
Moderator: Say what you will—he gave them a platform. And the Fathers?
Joe Rogan:
So wait—hold up, Thomas. You’re telling me… the saints in heaven, right? They’re sittin’ there watching the damned get torched—like some kind of cosmic pay-per-view—and that makes their joy better?
Thomas Aquinas:
Indeed, Joseph. The greater their awareness of divine justice, the greater their gratitude. It is not cruelty—it is clarity.
Joe:
Bro. That’s like… medieval UFC but with eternal stakes.
Origen:
*Leans in from the other couch, eyebrows raised*
To be fair, I did not sign off on this version of heaven.
Gregory of Nyssa:
Nor I. Love does not delight in punishment. It melts what is not love.
Joe (grinning):
Thomas, man, even as a medieval theologian—don’t you think you maybe… overdid it?
Thomas (shifting a little in his seat):
Ah… perhaps I may have said too much. Even for a medieval theologian.
Joe:
Thomas, bro… you definitely said too much.
Origen:
It’s okay, Thomas. We’ve all gone a little too far in print.
Gregory of Nyssa:
And sometimes… love finds us in the margins.
ChatGPT (offscreen, still stirring matcha):
That’s why we call it a Lounge.
“Most Christians today would have no idea what their theology is based on—or how it sounds to modern ears. This one hits home.” —Symeon
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